Well it finally happened. A dear friend agreed to go with me to see Sex and the City and off we went. The settings were great, the clothing was glamorous but best of all it was good to be back with Carrie, and her friends. I am not going to say much more about the movie, as you should be able to see if with fresh eyes when you go, not mine. But the concept of deep female friendship as essential to our health and well-being is such a wonderfully dominant theme in the movie that I must talk about it. Yes, the concept is valid and we really need our girlfriend. They help us laugh, cry, figure things out, feel understood and add meaning to the stories of our lives.
I was going through some of my papers from THE ENCHANTED SELF files. Suddenly I came across a letter than a wonderful women had written to me in September of l997. She herself, was about 89 at the time she wrote to me. Here is a little of what she said: "Reminiscing with old friends or family members, each recalling something you've long forgotten equals suddenly having your spirit soar....don't put off this great joy that has such physical as well as spiritual and curative powers....
How wise she was! I noticed in the audience at the movies that the women were of all ages. Some were early twenties, and many more middle age or older. Yes, we all know The Truth at some very deep level-we need each other and sharing ourselves makes our own identity more real and our own experience of being alive more meaningful. This is something I have been teaching women since I wrote PositivThe Enchanted Self, A Positive Therapy. And it is one of the gateways to happiness in my paper, The Seven Gateways to Happiness, which you can download for free on my site.
Now if only I could dress like Samantha for awhile. I won't even imagine dressing like Carrie as the last time I was almost that thin I had just had my appendix out at 12 and weighed 110 lbs.
Dr. Barbara Becker Holstein, www.enchantedself.com
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